Celebrating 100 Posts!!!! Woot!

At your 100th post you're supposed to write 100 things about yourself so here goes:
1. I survived the flu and am feeling better starting today.
2. I'm pretty sure I will wind up with a flu again before the year is out since I can't get a flu shot.
3. I conveniently developed an egg allergy just in time for the swine flu season keeping me from getting said flu shot.
4. I like cartoons
5. More than my kids
6. In fact I'm watching Ni Hao Kai Lan right now at one in the morning without one kid within the vicinity.
7. I am okay with this....... most of the time.
8. I'm a night owl
9. I sleep better during the day
10. I've tried sleeping at night like normal people only to be sleepy all day and wide awake at night (this was still after a month of having a "regular" sleeping pattern).
11. When I go on trips this does not apply for some reason ( I sleep fine at night and feel fine during the day).
12. I am afraid of enclosed spaces
13. I'm equally afraid of wide open spaces
14. Apparently my spaces have to be just right
15. I love listening to The News from Lake Wobegon
16. It reminds me of stories that my grandparents tell
17. Last year my grandfather died.
18. We knew before leaving for Guam that he was going to die
19. The man living next door to my SIL looks like my grandfather
20. I cry everytime after seeing him
21. I wasn't here when my grandfather passed and couldn't go to his funeral
22. I think it's just now hitting me that I'm not going to see him when I go home to visit my family
23. Someone told me that not being there would make losing him "not as bad"
24. They were wrong...... it just delayed the realization
25. I just moved back to the states from Guam
26. We were there for three years
27. It was pretty and warm and there were no Wal-Marts or Olive Gardens
28. It takes a whole day flying to get to the east coast of the US from Guam
29. That's way longer than any human being should have to be on a plane
30. I like watching the Star Wars movies
31. I like the originals better.
32. I also like Wallace and Gromit
33. Mainly because Gromit knits
34. I'm a self taught knitter
35. I first picked up the needles when I was 12
36. I picked them back up and became addicted at the age of 23
37. I always feel like I'm forgetting to do something important and it makes me have a moment of panic
38. I have a reoccurring dream where I'm at school, but I don't know where or when my next class is or I can't remember my locker combination so I can't get my books or my schedule and so I fail school, or I'm supposed to have been working for the past few days but I forgot and now I've lost my job.
39. I hate this dream
40. I wish I knew why I have that reoccurring dream so that I could stop having it and so I could stop feeling like I'm forgetting something important all the time.
41. For the record I have never forgotten something important
42. I am a procrastinator
43. I work better under pressure at the last minute
44. I enjoy playing video games
45. I like the games where you fight melee style because I like smashing things
46. This preference crossovers to real life in the form of Filipino Martial Arts
47. I have four rattan sticks and I love hitting things with them
48. I'm not above cheating in a fight
49. I believe the only fair fight is the one you lose
50. This means that I am a biter, pincher and hair puller.
51. I poke eyeballs too
52. I will poke other balls as well.
53. I hope to never be in a fight, but I believe in being able to defend your self
54. I love to read
55. I read my first novel "Starring Sally J. Freedman as Herself" by Judy Blume when I was five years old
56. At the time I thought a colored fountain was a fountain where the water came out in colors or maybe had coke instead of water (like a soda fountain) and I wished that they still had them because they sounded cool
57. I later found out (several years later in a history class) what a colored fountain really was. It wasn't cool.
58. I hate having sand grit on me. It's the most annoying thing ever.
59. I cringe everytime I hear the word "panties". It just sounds like a bad word.
60. I have an auto immune disease. It's psoriasis.
61. It burns like a second degree sunburn and itches until it makes you cry from frustration
62. My mom also has an auto immune disease. Crohn's
63. I'm the lucky one.
64. When I was a kid I never thought my mom would live to see me graduate high school
65. She did and was there when my daughter was born
66. I think she'll outlive us all
67. I always thought I would die by the age of 25
68. I'm glad I didn't
69. I hope I outlive us all.
70. I want to travel the world
71. Preferably in first class
72. My children act out movies while they watch them. When no one's around, so do I.
73. cuddling with my kids, hot cocoa, warm blankies and knitting are my favorite things
74. This may be why my favorite season is autumn
75. I enjoy reading fanfiction on the internet
76. Mostly of the mature persuasion
77. Someday I hope to write a novel
78. That doesn't suck
79. When I get hungry I actually crave vegetables
80. I think this comes from a childhood of mainly Hamburger Helper for dinner
81. I think older things have more soul then newer things (furniture, homes, etc)
82. I stopped believing in ghosts this past year
83. One would have to appear in front of me, say "I'm a ghost. Check this out." and then fly through me before I think I would believe again
84. I blame the hoakie Ghost Hunter shows for this
85. I'm not sure anymore what happens when you die
86. I hope there's another existence on the other side
87. It saddens me to think that there might not be
88. I wish a ghost would appear and clear all this mess up.
89. Nicely
90. I love Cracker Barrel
91. Sometimes I wish I could live there
92. When I was a young girl I wanted to marry Wolverine of the X-Men
93. After seeing Wolverine: Origins I realized that I still want to
94. If I won the lottery I would still buy a Kia for my car and spend less than 120,000 on a home
95. I like to think the rest would go to charity
96. In reality I would probably spend it on traveling
97. I hate when my husband snores
98. Sometimes I think of putting something like raisins up his nose to get him to stop
99. I also think of drawing on his face with a Sharpie while he sleeps
100. If he ever really pisses me off, I will.

What Could Suck More?

The flu. I think it has found me.

Psoriasis Sucks

I found that they're having a Walk for the Cure for Psoriasis here in Charlotte this coming weekend. I wish I had known sooner so that I could have signed up. Maybe I can still go up there and donate and have all my friends donate or something. I hope they do it again next year so that I can participate.
All this is made even more important to me by the fact that it seems like the Humira is starting to not be as effective. I'm finding that I'm getting some inverse spots back and my joints are screaming at me. All this may also be due to the dip in temperature (I'm crossing my fingers on this one) but I was starting to notice mroe aches and spots before we left Guam, but I shrugged it off to stress. I'm still shrugging things off to stress until I get to a doctor and he/she tells me otherwise. I'm hoping it's just the cold weather and a little hydrocortisone creme and ibuprofen will put everything back to rights. Say a prayer for me and keep your fingers crossed.

It's About Confidence

I finished a baby hat today. It didn't take that long and has me wondering why the LYS hasn't received more of the little buggers. Maybe I'm just an overachiever? I'm going to make another one tomorrow out of the same yarn and then I might go buy some more yarn (gasp!) and knit a few more in cotton or a wool cotton blend. I'm wanting to try Rowan's Wool Cotton and this gives me a good excuse to buy just one skein and see how it knits up. In fact I'm looking at this as an opportunity to try several different yarns one skein at a time (Malabrigo..... I'm lookin' at you). The superwash wool that I picked up was Mission Falls and I have to say it is surprisingly soft. I'm seeing a sweater in my future. The alpaca is still sitting here as an art piece, although my son decided he wanted to knit a hat and pushed my needles through the center of pull ball and completely twisted everything up. I had to pull a few yards from the center and untangle the mess and wrap it around the outside (once I use up those yards the ball will truly be a center pull ball again). I had one moment of insanity where I considered rewinding the whole thing into a ball, but then came up with this brain saving solution.
I also found what has to be one of the best quotes of all time while looking around on other knit blogs.
"Most man chores just require the confidence to whack the crap out of something until it works."
Amen, sister.

Happiness..... Thy Name is Close Knit

I found the LYS!!!!! It's called Close Knit Knittery (aka the yellow house). I walked in with a huge smile and by the time I left I was still grinning like an idiot. On Tuesday nights they have a knit night so everyone was in there knitting together around a huge rustic wooden dining table. This place is the best yarn store I have ever been in. It's a house and it has a huge front porch with a swing and rocking chairs. There were so many colors of Cascade 220 on the walls I just wanted to stare at it for hours (really someone should photograph it and put it in a museum). It had yarn crammed into every crevice and the lady at the front counter, Dawn (? I stink at remembering names and honestly the woolen fumes were making me giddy with happiness), was the sweetest lady ever. She wound my 660 yd skein of alpaca (thank God!) and I bought an extra skein of Mission Falls Superwash wool to make a baby hat with since they collect them for the local hospitals. I don't really know what I'm going to make with this load of alpaca, but for now it's screaming wrap at me. It's so soft and beautiful. It's somewhere between a fingering and a DK weight (maybe more of a fingering) and is so soft and cozy feeling. It has autumn wear in every fiber of it's being. I'm also seeing a pair of fingerless gloves in this huge skein. Right now I'm just petting it......... repeatedly. I may just keep the ball as a pet.

Settling in with Hyperventilation

Amazingly we made it here to North Carolina. It's a plane trip I will never make again unless I have First Class seats or a death wish. I spent the first few days feeling drunk from jet lag and marveling at how much my ankles can swell. Currently we are without transportation until after 6pm every evening. This doesn't help with the house and job hunting fronts. I'm also finding that the more time I spend looking for a job, the less air I am physically able to draw into my lungs before I begin to freak out and need a paper bag. I haven't worked in seven years. Scratch that..... I haven't worked a job that pays with money in seven years. Being a mom is hard work and lends you many skills that can be taken with you into the workforce. But having been out of the loop for the past seven years has left me wondering what I'm good at, what can I do, what do I like to do....... basically I'm faced with the question of WHO AM I? This question is answered by another bout of panic attacks and hyperventilation. Throw in the fact that I am now expected to be the main bread winner (self imposed expectation) and I am FREAKING OUT!!!! All this occurs internally and I keep having that dream where I'm at school and I'm supposed to be in class, but I've missed several months and I don't have a schedule to tell me where to go. I hate that dream. It's one that I have often and if I could I would kick it's ass far away after hobbling it's legs so that it could never come back.
Let us pause for a moment to breathe.................. yeah, that crap isn't working.

Stick Fighting is Dangerous

Every Saturday is a practice day from 9 to 11 at the beach. So much fun. Today we also had a barbeque. I'm gonna miss this group of peeps when I have to leave.
Kash is our teacher. He's a badass.

And this is Stacy (Spaztacular), Trish (Munchkin) and her boyfriend, Matt.

I don't have a pic of Daniel, but here's a pic of him holding a praying mantis on the end of his training stick.

New Yarn Equals True Love

I got my yarn! Which means that I've cast on for new projects and left my current projects laying to the side, sobbing softly. I started DD's blanket and I'm doubting that I'm going to have it finished before we have to leave. Especially since I just found out this week that we're leaving by the 21st...... of this month. What is today????? CrAP.
The blanket is turning out beautifully though.

I also cast on for a Blossom Hat from the fall 09 issue of Designer Knitting. It's coming along and it'll look great on my daughter. I was hoping that it would be my hat, but it's looking like it's going to be too small. I tried to start a few mittens, but they were coming out too small so I had to frog them. It's my first try at mittens so I'm trying to get the basic pattern committed to memory. Maybe these can be the projects that I finish on the plane.

I May Have Lost My MiNd

My mind is reeling. I have (within the past 24 hours) come up with 20 knitting projects that I HAVE to get done before we leave here. The thought of disembarking the plane and immediately freezing to the ground outside because of a lack of wooly garments seems like a complete possibility. Therefore all four members of my family are going to need hats, gloves, scarves, sweaters and socks. I'm sure that I can finish this feat...... if I suddenly develop a mutant power that allows me super speed. Hmmmm, that might set my knitting afire.

The Sock Gnome Strikes Again

I can't find my dark purple Phineas sock! I need it so I know how many sts to cast on for the second sock. If you're reading this Mr. Sock Gnome I have a very colorful alpaca/wool blend sock that you can have if you return my purple Phineas sock intact and without any crumbs inside the toe ( I know you like to eat Cheez-its in bed, but please be curtious). If that doesn't strike your fancy, I also have a pink Phineas sock that will never need a mate (I used the rest of the yarn to make some lovely socks that I'm wearing at the moment....... I also know how you like the girlier colors......I won't ask so that you won't have to tell).

Busy as Worker Bees

Newfound freedom has led me into a busier life. I've been taking self defense classes. I finished the advanced class at the end of July. Since then I've joined a Filipino martial arts group. I'm learning a lot and get to get out in the sun every Saturday for two hours when we meet. There are practices during the week too, held indoors. The kids have been busy taking various sports to keep them running around during the summer break. It'll be back to school next week though, so they'll be busy with that.
I've been trying to lose weight with no luck so far. My focus has shifted to being healthy and having enough energy to do things with my kids. DH is leaving the military since his knee can not be fixed. We'll be leaving our tropical island before the holidays get into full swing...... which leads me into KNITTING.
We'll be back home just in time for the cold weather. I've already knitted my son a blanket using a pattern from Debbie Bliss' fall magazine (love this magazine!). It's the Running Stitch Blanket and I modified it by making it bigger with only one layer/side (I wanted to finish it sometime before he leaves for college) and I didn't put in the contrasting running stitch. But the stitch pattern is beautiful in itself and it turned out better then I hoped. I'm trying my hand at a top down cardigan for my daughter. My first attempt was knit from the bottom up and is a little tighter then I would like. It actually fits perfectly, but it's knit in cotton and will very likely shrink the first time it's washed making it too small for her. I'm going up a needle size, adding a few stitches and trying it from the top down because I hate seams. I have to figure out how top down construction will work. I already have the gauge figured, but I have to figure out how many stitches to start with around the neck. I'm probably overthinking it and making it more complicated then it needs to be in my mind.
I'm hoping to come into some yarn shortly so I can begin knitting a cardigan for myself. I'm looking at Oblique on knitty.com in a heathered plum color. I also want to start on a blanket for my daughter and a sweater for my little boy. I want them to be warm when we get where we're going...... where ever that may be. I'm planning on having at least one of those projects for the plane ride (18 hours in coach..... ARGHHHHHHHH!). Probably my son's sweater since I want to have DD blanket done so she can use it on the plane and I think my cardigan would take longer then the plane ride and I wish to have it ready to wear when I get off the plane. DS sweater could be done in one piece and finished before we get to Hawaii (crap..... what will I do from there for the next eight hours?). I may need more then one project. Hopefully they won't confiscate my needles. I will cry.

Why I Love My Dear Hubby

So I'm sitting and knitting in the bedroom and suddenly I hear my DH sing ( from the adjoining room),
"Ho-may-hi-ma-heh-la!"
a few seconds tick by
"Chicken!"
a few more seconds
"sambolina....... I love you!"
still a few more seconds and then
"it's delicious!"

I can't help but laugh.

SWEEEEEEET!

So I had my first Humira shot on the 8th of April. It hurt like a mother. A week later there was a noticable difference in my skin. Sweet. This past Wednesday I had my second shot and I took the advice of my mom and several other Humira takers on Ravelry and took the shot in my stomach this time. It didn't hurt. I barely even felt it. Double sweet. My fingers aren't hurting anymore and I'm actually able to write again (something that had become impossible with the joint pain in my fingers). Triple sweet.
I sat outside, sweated and didn't get itchy. Even sweeter still!
All this has given me a case of startitis (as the Yarn Harlot would call it) and I have cast on several projects even though I still have several projects that are just a sewn seam away from being finished. I need a case of finish-it-upitis. I cast on for my second Bellatrix Deux sock and started a pair of socks for my son. There's also a blanket that I started. I had this huge skein of white acrylic (Red Heart) and decided that a nice seed stitch throw would be the best thing to make of it. So far it is coming along good, but I've become a bit of a yarn snob in that I keep wishing it were a natural fiber like cotton or wool. I have about six or so projects on Ravelry that are in progress not counting the socks that I cast on for my son and the acrylic blanket. There's also another throw that I started about a month ago in seed stitch as well, but made from Suri Dream (knitpicks). I only have three skeins of the Suri so I'm taking my time until I can afford to get a few more skeins. I tried casting on for a scarf knit in self striping Felici (Schooner), but I couldn't get it the way I wanted and I think I'm going to have to try and look up double knitting. At first I tried a k1, sl1 pattern, but didn't like the texture that I was getting. Then I tried knitting in a tube, but I don't like the way it knits up that way either. With the tube scarves I always feel like they're off kilter and would prefer if both sides were attached in some way. This is what made me think of DK as an option. It's a technique that I've been wanting to try and a scarf would be a nice jumping off point. And for some stupid reason when I bought yarn I decided that I needed to try the new cotton sport yarn instead of getting more Suri (which I'm going to need more of eventually) and I have it in my head to cast that on as something soon. I need to finish some of this stuff. Some of these unfinished projects are things that I were supposed to send to my mom back at Christmas time (what can I say..... I hate the post office). Anyways, I'm off to finish up the first sock for my son. If I can buckle down then maybe I'll sew up the kitchener seam on that hood and get it finished so I can mail it to my mom and weave in the ends on the Jayne hat so I can send it off to my sister. Here's to hoping.

Full Circle

I may actually begin to blog about knitting and not my health problems. I have a full body outbreak of psoriasis and in the process of educating myself and asking the doctor the right questions I found that psoriasis can cause several vitamin deficiencies. On April 8th I will be put on a biologic called Humira to clear the full body flare that I'm having and to help stave off the arthritis that has also been developing from the psoriasis. I'm glad that the doctor finally went to this step because I have had lots of spots covering my body since November. A few of my spots have been with me for more then four years which is a pretty good indicator that my body isn't planning on a remission anytime soon. About a month ago I started having very noticable joint pain in my fingers. I had joint pain in other places, but didn't think anything about it because I thought I was too young to have arthritis so it must be muscle pain. All my tendon and ligament problems are from the psoriasis as well.
Hopefully all that will disappear once I go on this medicine. I started taking a multivitamin a few weeks ago (before I found out about the vitamin deficiencies this past week) just so that I would be doing all I could heath wise to help my body out (in addition to eating right, exercising, drinking plenty of water...... something I actually suck at most days......, and getting enough sleep). About a week into taking them I got a burst of energy that I hadn't had in a long time. Gratefully that has stuck with me and has made life a bit better (fatigue was one of my chief complaints..... still have it, but not as bad as before..... at least now I can do things).
I had to settle on taking Benadryl for itching since the pill the doctor gave me knocks me out. I tried to see if I would get used to it, but got sick of feeling half drunk all the time. I was sleeping like a hibernating bear and couldn't drive (it felt very unsafe to do so). Sometimes I take it if things get really bad and it's Friday. That way I have the weekend to sleep and my hubby is home with the kids and can drive us around.
I feel very vindicated at this point. For so long I felt like there was something wrong with my body, but couldn't really pinpoint it. I had tried to explain the symptoms to doctors only to be looked at funny. So then I would take a step back and think "Maybe I just feel weird because I recently had a baby or maybe I'm just imagining things" and would go on with my life only to have the same cycle of symptoms hit me again. My mom has Crohn's which is an auto immune disease and I knew that my dad's brother has psoriasis, which is another auto immune disease and puts me in a prime position to have one myself (just my mom having one really ups my chance). They (auto immune diseases) also have vague symptoms that plague you and don't show up on tests given until you really have a flare. But they can damage your body for years before then and so I knew that if I had one that it needed to be found and dealt with so that it would do as little damage as possible (preventative measures). Not always possible, but worth trying. At least I know that I'm not crazy. My current doctor once told me that because I entertained the notion that it might all be in my head that it probably wasn't. She kept working with me until we found out what it was.
I can't wait to be me again. To feel like me again and not the run down, half living being that I've survived as for the past several years. I feel hope and happiness and I feel like I have something to look forward to because I'll have the health to actually live and not just exist. My mom once told me when she was real sick that she was tired of just existing. I now know what she meant. You live day to day waiting for a "good day" that never seems to come. That day when you'll have enough energy and feel good enough to go out and do something you enjoy. You keep waiting and waiting because that's all you have the energy for. I got some of that back and I look forward to getting it all back. In fact I'm TAKING it back, damnit!