Amazingly we made it here to North Carolina. It's a plane trip I will never make again unless I have First Class seats or a death wish. I spent the first few days feeling drunk from jet lag and marveling at how much my ankles can swell. Currently we are without transportation until after 6pm every evening. This doesn't help with the house and job hunting fronts. I'm also finding that the more time I spend looking for a job, the less air I am physically able to draw into my lungs before I begin to freak out and need a paper bag. I haven't worked in seven years. Scratch that..... I haven't worked a job that pays with money in seven years. Being a mom is hard work and lends you many skills that can be taken with you into the workforce. But having been out of the loop for the past seven years has left me wondering what I'm good at, what can I do, what do I like to do....... basically I'm faced with the question of WHO AM I? This question is answered by another bout of panic attacks and hyperventilation. Throw in the fact that I am now expected to be the main bread winner (self imposed expectation) and I am FREAKING OUT!!!! All this occurs internally and I keep having that dream where I'm at school and I'm supposed to be in class, but I've missed several months and I don't have a schedule to tell me where to go. I hate that dream. It's one that I have often and if I could I would kick it's ass far away after hobbling it's legs so that it could never come back.
Let us pause for a moment to breathe.................. yeah, that crap isn't working.
1 comment:
I know what you mean.. I didnt work for almost 2 years and when I went back to work I had a very hard time finding a job.. It just sucks to no end to feel like you are out of the loop of the working world.
and the Namaste Zuma bag is great!! its just right for a purse and a couple small projects. I am really loving this bag. get one :)
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